So…I’ve been pondering something for a while now and I’m hoping that in sharing my thoughts on this subject it can shed some light as to what is happening when it comes to this issue. I have SO many thoughts when it comes to this issue that I hope that I am able to convey them all and in a way that will provoke thought and discussions. Over these past few years body modification or desire to enhance one’s features has become very popular and highly sought after. Now, this has been taking place for years in the white affluent community where plastic surgery has been very prevalent and a huge industry. Yet, in the black community the “thick” phenomenon and the gross desire to fit this mold has taken over and is getting out of hand. What sparked these thoughts were the numerous photos that I’ve either viewed online or have received via text of black women and even some black men 0_o who have altered their body to appear “thick.” It’s very sad that black women feel that in order to fit this mold that they need to surgically alter their body, yet the fact that black men are also going to these lengths are unfathomable and is a different converstaion on its own!
To get to the root, I believe It stems from what is portrayed in the media, a lack of esteem in oneself and seeing the beauty in how they were created. There are so many black women in the media who have also bought into this “thick” craze. I mean, look at Nicki Minaj who has drastically altered her appearance to fit this particular mold. We can all see the extreme contrast of what she looked like prior to becoming a mainstream artist and being in the lime light. Because of this, many black women perceive this as the only way to be desired/get the attention of men and go to drastic measures to have bodies like the women they see on TV and magazines. To most black women being “thick” has become the stamp of approval, but really it has adverse effects. Now, I’m not saying that having curves is a bad thing; it really does suit some women when natural…that’s not the argument. Yet, what does the notion that you’re only a “grade A” female, will only be desired by men if you possess these features or where this is the “standard” of black beauty say to younger black women who are growing up and wanting to emulate what they see older women doing? What does this tell them when it comes to how they will view themselves and their body? There are things we have all at some point wanted to change about ourselves physically, but what concerns me are the lengths and the means to which someone will go in order to attain what they “think” is how they want to look. I also wonder, in making these change will they ever feel satisfied? How will they be able to properly esteem the young girls who watch them? Or even worse…when this ideal of being a “thick” black women gets old and what is considered to be “grade A” changes…as it will; then what?
I’ve been slim my whole life and have desired curves, yet there is nothing that would bring me to the point of altering my body unnaturally to achieve that. What happened to achieving your desired body through simply taking CARE of it, eating properly and exercising? To achieve the things I want to see in my own body I work at them. Key word…WORK and I have seen the fruit of that work gradually over time. We live in such a microwave society that it has come to the point where no one has the time or patience to allow things to happen…we have to have things now and if not, we will find a way to get it and quick. Yet, many of us rarely remember that what has not been truly worked for comes with its own pitfalls over time. With anything in this life…we can attain most things, yet being able to keep or maintain them is another story. I’ve read a couple articles of women who have died over this gross desire to have a large butt, small waist and a “cute” shape and that is what disturbs me the most when it comes to this crave for curves. I mean the fact that women can become so desperate for this change that they will seek out black market injections and will entrust their life and health with NO qualms is very scary. To entrust your life to someone who “claims” to be surgeons is outrageous! These predators cut open women and/or inject them with tire sealant and forms of cement in the attempt to give these results. Deception can present itself based on something we claim to need...people who seek to get over on others do not care about the livelihood of others...
Again, this comes down to being whole and having a sense of self and who you are. Knowing that you are beautiful the way you were created and that others will see the beauty in that. There is beauty is all of us and it saddens me to think that women feel that they have to go to great lengths in order to feel/know that they already possess this. It does not mean you should not desire to enhance or improve what you’ve been given if that will add to your happiness…it means that if you’re like me and was not born with a body that is naturally curvy, then you enhance and accentuate what you do have in a natural way. And it most certainly should not be something a women does solely for the attention of men. Yes, women who succumb to the pressures of societal views on beauty and choose to alter their bodies receive a lot of attention from men. Yet, it’s all surface and usually lacks longevity. A lot of people, women specifically fail to work with what they already have which preserves what makes them unique. Nothing takes away more from your own personal identity than conforming to societal trends and views…what sets you a part and makes you different from other women? You have now put yourself in a box with all the other women who also fit this mold. As women, we need to see ourselves for the beautiful women we are. As I mature and embrace womanhood I’ve learned to accept how I was created. Maturation means to grow, to ripe, being brought to maturity and that’s exactly what I’m working towards. It is my hope that other women will read this and will also embrace this. We must always keep in mind that society will always go with what’s “hot,” you don’t have to fall for that…have your own standard of beauty and cultivate what makes you sexy!
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